Letters To Norah {Two Months}

Dear Norah,

I know you'll hear me say this all too often, but wow, time flies. I want life to slow down. I want to bottle up every single moment I spend with you. I continue to have a long list of projects to complete -- I don't get much done because all I want to do is spend time with you! Just the other day, I packed up all of your newborn clothes. I got a little teary-eyed putting everything away wondering how in the world you already outgrew so many things!  

Your second month has been packed full. You are quite a flexible baby and enjoy being on the go! The weather continues to be cold, so we haven't been able to get outside as much as I had hoped. When we do, you love the fresh air! This month, you watched your fair share of IU basketball games {oh, how you LOVE watching basketball on TV}, had your first play date {with Henry!}, went to your first brewery {shhhh, don't tell!}, went shopping far too many times, went to your own "Meet Norah" party, met your new dog-cousin, Ellie, celebrated your first St. Patrick's Day and Nana's birthday, smiled at mommy and daddy for the first time, and much more! 

{Trying to hide your cute smile...you NEVER do it when I have the camera out...} 

You look so much like daddy, it's crazy. However, you do have my chubby "Roe" cheeks. I love those cute cheeks of yours! You are growing so much! You have almost doubled in size since you were born. You went to the doctor today for your two month check-up and you weighed 11 pounds 1 ounce and are 23 inches long! I think you may be tall, like daddy. Oh, how I love chubby babies. I can't get over how cute your little legs are...

You continue to be a good sleeper {we can't thank you enough}! A couple weeks ago, we started making your last feeding a 4oz bottle and then putting you in bed. You have been sleeping 7-8 hours every night! We are all so well-rested in the morning and all in good moods! Even though you are a good night time sleeper, you aren't the best napper. We're going to work on you napping in your crib on a more consistent schedule. As long as you continue sleeping so long at night, I don't really mind you being up more during the day! 

You LOVE playing and looking around at your toys. You talk the most when you are laying on your back when you can kick your legs. The coos you make are the cutest noises I've ever heard. Of course, you make it difficult for me to capture your talking on camera! You so want to be on the go -- you don't stop moving. You are so strong and have really good head control. You love sitting up because you can see more. Sometimes you like to stand while we hold you up. 

{Look at you holding your head up!}

You have a new thing that kinda drives me nuts -- you love rubbing your face around on our chests while we hold you. I'm not sure if it feels good or what. Often you end up moving your head back and forth so quickly that you hit your head into our face and it doesn't feel great! :) You are quite dramatic. The drama is clear in your sneezes. You don't often sneeze just one time, most of the time you have multiple sneezes at once. 

{Sneezing - Bless You!}

It's amazing how alert you are now. You love looking at our faces and listening to us make different sounds. I can tell you are trying to figure out how you can make those sounds. You've already started smacking your lips. You've recently discovered your hands and you love sucking on them! Please don't become a thumb-sucker -- let's keep with the binky! You've started drooling quite a bit now and we often see you blowing bubbles! 

For one month, I've been eating dairy free. Your belly is starting to feel a little better. I feel so badly when it hurts you though. Thank goodness for gas medicine! :) Unfortunately, you are probably going to need that for the rest of your life...sorry! Really, the only time you fuss is when your belly hurts or when you are hungry. When you are upset, Cooper and Olive run right to you and try to help out. They love covering you in kisses and cannot wait for you to start playing with them.

I know this next month is going to be full of new experiences for you. I can't wait to see how many new things you learn and start doing in the upcoming weeks. It's amazing how quickly you are growing and changing. We are going to have so much fun together now that the weather is getting nicer and we're going to get to spend more time outside. {Plus, I can't wait to get you in your new spring/summer clothes -- they are the cutest!} 

I love you to the moon and back!

Mommy

Dairy Free Living

Last week, we started noticing blood in Norah's diapers...scary. However, I had heard that this can happen with infants and many times it means that they have a milk allergy. Luckily, N had her one month doctor appointment on Friday. They tested a couple of her diapers. Sure enough, her little body cannot break down the cow's milk in my diet. 

At first, I thought it wasn't going to be that big of a deal. I don't drink milk and I can cut out the occasional bowls of cereal I have for breakfast. Wrong. Her pediatrician suggested that I cut out the big three diary foods -- milk, cheese, and yogurt. After leaving the doctor in a somewhat sour mood, Kurt and I started talking about all of the things I can't eat now. Holy crap...I really didn't realize HOW MUCH dairy I eat until I started thinking about needing to take it out. 

My sour mood turned bitter and then I just became pissed. How in the world was I going to be able to do this?!? I've never been a good dieter. When I say I'm not going to eat certain things, I crave them even more. I pretty much told myself that this wasn't going to work and that we'd end up putting Norah on the special formula anyway. 

While I won't mind having to give her the formula if that's ultimately best for her, I've now decided I'm really going to give this a go. Not only do I want her feeling better {she's been gassy and quite unhappy the last week or so}, I realized that this could be an opportunity to think about what I'm putting in my body while trying to eat healthier. Fingers crossed, I'll loose weight too! ;) 

I know I'm not the only mom out there struggling with hearing that they are going to have to eliminate all diary from their diets. Reading the ingredient list on pretty much everything at the store makes grocery trips really fun especially when you have an infant to feed often {cue sarcasm}! {Who knew all the different code names for dairy in things?!?} So while this is all really new to me, I've decided I'm going to try to blog about this whole experience, write down what has been good and not, document delicious food, and potentially help another mom out there struggling to find ways to eat dairy free, while making her baby feel better! 

{P.S.- This whole thing seems much better when you have a supportive husband who is cutting out dairy from his diet and being so incredibly helpful finding foods and recipes! :) }

Foods I've {so far} Found That Are Good Substitutes:

*Almond Milk - So far, we've tried the Silk brand, original and vanilla flavor. The original flavor with cereal is delicious. Vanilla, not so much. I think we'll stick to the original. {Bonus, it's less calories than the vanilla!}

*SO Delicious Coconut Milk Creamer - Yum. I tried the almond milk in my morning coffee and it wasn't great. This creamer {at least the french vanilla} is delicious. 

*SO Delicious Coconut Milk ice cream - Pretty good. Definitely a good treat to have around when I'm craving ice cream. Of course, the real stuff is much better. But, I'm thankful for having this around when I'm craving a frozen treat. 

*Whole Foods Vegan Chocolate Chip Cookies - Delicious! They are kinda expensive, but really I would NEVER know they aren't the real deal.

*Smart Balance Light {Extra Virgin Olive Oil} - I'm picky about my butter. While this isn't technically butter, it tastes delicious. 

*Starbucks Soy Hazelnut Latte {instead of my skinny vanilla} is a pretty good alternative. 

Things I've learned so far:

*Know all of the different ways diary can be listed in ingredients. I found this to be helpful, especially the "Know What To Avoid" section. I often look at the bottom of the ingredients to where it says, "CONTAINS." If milk or dairy is listed there, I don't even look through the ingredients. If nothing is listed, I quickly read through the list to double check. 

*Don't assume that because a product is labeled "Dairy Free" that there aren't some kind of milk product in it. Very frustrating, I know. I found something {I forget what now} at the store yesterday that was labeled dairy free, but had milk listed under the CONTAINS section on the label. 

*Look for foods that are vegan. You know you'll be safe eating these because a vegan diet does not have any diary. Even though I'm not going completely vegan, I have bought quite a few vegan products {I'll let you know how they are} and have found a bunch of vegan recipes that I'm going to try {I'll probably add meat to them.

*Use the internet. I've found a ton of information, helpful tips, and easy recipes online. I've searched Pinterest and the Whole Foods website. 

*Buy lots of fruits and veggies. Yum! 

What I'm been eating/tired so far:

*English muffins with peanut butter
*Salad
*Homemade tuna salad 
*Homemade egg salad/hardboiled eggs  
*Last night for dinner I made delicious white chicken chili and this dairy free cornbread {I used almond milk instead of soy}. 
*Chips and guac {spicy kind from Fresh Market}
*Veggie Straws
*Baked Lays (original)
*365 (Whole Foods) Sourdough Bread 

One thing that's going to be really tricky for me is not having the option of eating out at a lot of restaurants. We are suckers for eating out. I'm going to have to be really careful about what I order when I do go out. Realistically, we probably will be cooking in way more than we typically do...not really a bad thing! 

Wish me luck! I know I have a lot to learn! If you are reading because you are on a similar journey, good luck! Any helpful tips are greatly appreciated! Hopefully I'll have time to keep updating with tips, recipes, and foods I've found are helpful/delicious! 

Letters To Norah {One Month}

Dear Norah,

I can't believe we've already known you for a month {well really 5 weeks because mommy is late writing to you}! My pregnancy seemed like forever and time went by so very slowly. The last five weeks have gone faster than I could have ever imagined. I've always heard people talk about falling in love with their babies so quickly -- it's so true. From the second I heard, "It's A Girl!!" my heart was filled with love for you and it's only grown. 

You entered this world quite dramatically and scared mommy and daddy more than you'll ever know. While I absolutely hate to see you upset, I am so very thankful that I get to hear your cries now. When you were born, you had a very hard time breathing and were gasping for air. You were not able to cry and that's how I knew something was wrong.

You are incredibly brave. Your stressful delivery and short stay in the NICU showed so much about you. You are such a strong little girl and a fighter. At the hospital, you continued to amaze the doctors and nurses with how well you did and how quickly you recovered. We are forever thankful for their hard work to make sure you were safe, but really it was all your hard work that allowed us to come home together just 48 hours after you were born. Always remember to work hard and never, ever give up. 

I've learned so much since you came into our lives. Thank you for all of the many things you've taught us so far. I'm sure you will continue to teach us things each and every day. Watching daddy with you makes my heart melt. I never imagined that I could love him more than I already did, but when I saw him with you the first couple times, I fell in love with him even more. You already have him wrapped around your finger. And I'm pretty sure that will only continue as you get older! :)

Thank you for choosing us to be your parents. We are the luckiest people in the world to have you. Not only are we incredibly smitten about you, your two doggies love you so much! We know they are going to be your best friends when you get a little older. Coop is absolutely overprotective. He goes wherever you are, especially if you are crying. He loves lying by the glider in your room when I feed you. Olive is very curious about you. She loves sniffing you and often looks at you wondering when you'll want to play with her. I know you'll spend a great deal of time playing with each other in the grass when you are older.  

You are a very chill baby. You don't get upset very often. When you do, we know you want or need something from us. I have a feeling you may be impatient like your daddy. You definitely get frustrated easily like both of us. We wonder if you'll be stubborn. Both of us are incredibly stubborn. You were when you were in mommy's belly, I can assure you that!

One of your most favorite things is to snuggle, especially with daddy. I can't tell you the number of times we've had snuggle mornings where you went back to sleep on one of our chests so we could all get a little more sleep. Recently you haven't been feeling well {because we just found out that you are allergic to the dairy in my diet} and been having a hard time falling asleep because it hurts your belly. But, the second we take you out of your crib and snuggle you, you fall right asleep. As I write this, you are sleeping on my chest because you couldn't get comfy in your crib. 

Thank you, thank you, thank you for being a good sleeper! Mommy and daddy LOVE to sleep and it is so helpful that you do too! From the beginning, you pretty much only wake up one time in the middle of the night. Some mornings you go back to sleep after you eat and let everyone actually sleep in. You don't sleep in our room, and that's a good thing. If you did, you'd keep us up all night. You are one noisy sleeper!! You have quite a few dreams, good and bad, and you grunt and make so many noises. {The doctor thinks you're going to be a talker because of all the noises you already make -- and you're already cooing at a month old!} You are doing a really great job of learning how to self-soothe and get yourself to fall back asleep when you wake up in the middle of the night. 

Each day, you are becoming more alert and are beginning to become aware of what's going on around you. You absolutely love looking at high contrast pictures. You have an animal book that Aunt Mer gave you that you love looking at, especially during tummy time. You love to listen to music. You and I listen to songs almost every morning after you wake up. I've tried to read you a couple books before bedtime, but you aren't too interested in that yet. You are beginning to like bath time much more than you did the first couple times. 

You have done many things since you've been here. We've been to the mall a bunch! I'm sure you'll love shopping just like your mommy and Nana do! {You have quite the wardrobe already...!} Most of the time we run errands, you stay sound asleep in your seat. We've been out to dinner a couple different times. You have gone to two of daddy's hockey games. I think you're going to grow up to be a big sports fan! I wonder if you'll be athletic like daddy when you're older. 

You love to eat! I can't believe how much you've grown in 5 weeks. We took you to the doctor a couple days ago and you were 9 lbs 7.5 oz! We didn't have any clothes that fit you when you were born. All of the clothes we bought/borrowed after you were born are too small now because you've grown so much! Because you love to eat so much, you also love to poop. It seems like all we're doing is changing poopy diapers! :) Right now, you're tummy isn't feeling great because of your dairy allergy. I'm so sorry that you aren't feeling well. I'm working hard to not eat any foods that will make you feel sick. Let's hope it works and you get to feeling better soon. Hopefully you'll outgrow this when you're older so you can enjoy dairy as much as I do! 

Lovie, you are perfect. From your chubby cheeks, to your chunky belly and cute belly button, to your long legs. I love every single thing about you. I can't wait to see what's in store for us in the future and to continue making many memories with you. I love you to the moon and back.

Love,
Mommy

Welcome To The World, Sweet Baby!

A little over four weeks ago, our lives changed. And I wouldn't change a bit about it! I feel like the last four weeks have gone by so very quickly but that I've known our little lady for so much longer! Norah made quite a dramatic entry into the world. Within the first seconds of her life, I had fallen in love more than I could have ever imagined all while being absolutely scared to death and feeling completely helpless. We knew during my pregnancy that our baby is going to give us a run for our money, but really Norah, did you need to start so soon?!? :) 

My labor and delivery did not go a thing like I had imagined. I truly didn't know what all to expect, but never in my wildest dreams did I ever imagine most of what happened in the 39 hours that we waited for our sweet baby to join us. Norah's birth story is something I'll never forget, all 39 hours of it. A lot happened in 39 hours. It's going to be a long post. Here we go...

Friday, January 25 is when it all started. Kurt and I went over to my parents' house for dinner. My parents had picked up Mexican food from La Piedad for us to eat. Our three nieces were there while Andy and Quinn went to dinner to celebrate Quinn's birthday. When they were finished eating, we celebrated Quinn's birthday with a delicious ice cream cake from Coldstone. After the celebrations, Kurt and I made our way home. At 2ish in the morning is when I was awoken by contractions. I had been having quite a few Braxton Hicks in the weeks before this, so I didn't think too much about them. I tossed and turned for an hour or so and continued to have contractions. I kinda didn't believe that I could really be in labor. I thought our baby would totally be late if we let her and I had an induction scheduled for Sunday, January 27. However, the contractions did seem a bit different than the ones I had had before and definitely hurt more. Shortly after 3, I woke Kurt up because I was starting to get more uncomfortable {especially in my lower back} and thought it was about time to begin timing the contractions. 

Around 7:30/8:00, we decided it was probably time to call the doctor. My contractions had consistently been about 7 minutes apart since I started timing them and I was definitely beginning to feel more in pain. The doctor on call, Dr. Moon, told me that they typically don't recommend for women to come in until the contractions are 5 minutes apart, but that I could come in to get checked if I wanted. I decided I wanted to go in. I felt like it was definitely time. We got up, ate breakfast, showered, cleaned up the house a bit, made sure we had all of our things, and headed out the door. My contractions were starting to get worse. As we were about to walk out of the house, a contraction brought me to tears. I'm not sure if it was all just pain. I think I was overwhelmed and really couldn't believe this was happening. I was also pretty nervous about being in the car for 20-30 minutes and how contractions would feel while sitting down. It wasn't terrible. I did have a few contractions while driving, but the traffic wasn't bad and we made it there pretty quickly. 

Kurt dropped me off at the door and I waited inside for him. He grabbed all our things and we headed up to the maternity ward. We walked around for a few minutes trying to figure out where we were supposed to check in and finally found the nurse station. They knew we were coming and took us to one of the rooms. They had me undress and hooked me up to a couple monitors. They took some information from me and then went ahead and checked me. I was only 2/3cm. They said they were going to leave me in that room for a little while to keep an eye on me before they admitted me. They didn't think I was in active labor and weren't sure that Dr. Moon would want me to stay. Thankfully they gave me a shot of pain medicine in my thigh that did help with some of the pain. At this point, I needed to breathe deeply and squeeze Kurt's hand or the side of the bed with each contraction, so pain medicine was greatly appreciated! 

After a couple hours of being monitored, the nurse came in to tell me that I wasn't going to be admitted and they needed me to go home. She said that I could take Tylenol PM to help me get some rest. She told me that I should come back in when the contractions were 5 minutes apart. We were both more than frustrated. I didn't understand how they could send me home when I was clearly in labor. Maybe I wasn't about to have a baby in the next hour, but it was clear that a baby was going to be born soon. It also didn't make sense to us that they would send us home especially since I had an induction scheduled for just over 24 hours away. They unhooked me from all the monitors, we got all of our things, and headed out to the car. I remember sharing an elevator with a lady who was visiting someone else at the hospital. She asked if we were coming in to have a baby. We told her that we were actually being sent home and she could tell how frustrated we were. She didn't understand why we would be sent home and went on to say, "Don't they know you'll be back in a few hours anyway?!?" 


At that point, we were hungry but I was in no shape to sit in a restaurant. We decided to pick up Yats on the way home. While we were driving, I called my parents to let them know that we had been to the hospital but I didn't get admitted. This was the first we had told anyone that I was in labor because we wanted to make sure it was for real. It was sorta difficult to talk on the phone because I kept having contractions that I'd have to breathe through. 


When we got home, we both quickly ate our lunch and got ready to get back in bed. We were exhausted because we had basically been up all night. It was mid afternoon by the time we finally got in bed. Thankfully I had Tylenol PM at the house because I had been taking it some nights the last couple weeks of my pregnancy to help me sleep. I took a couple pills and quickly fell asleep. I slept for about an hour and a half before my contractions woke me up again. By now, my contractions were bad. I was in so much back labor, it was unreal. I used our heating pad to help with the pain a little bit. Really the only thing that felt okay was to lay in bed with the heating pad and squeeze Kurt's hand every time I had a contraction. We called Kurt's parents and asked them to come get the dogs. We weren't sure when the baby would come, but we didn't want to have to worry about the dogs and how we would get them to his parents' house. 


Around 6 or 7, my contractions actually began to space out even longer. They were coming every 10 minutes or so. I kinda stopped timing them because I thought that maybe my labor was stopping and that I'd just have to wait until Sunday evening to go in for my induction. I actually felt a little relief. While I was still in a lot of pain, I was able to get out of bed for a little bit to eat a quick dinner. Sitting up really didn't feel good, so after eating I headed back up to bed. Shortly after getting back in bed, my contractions started getting really, really bad. Like screaming in pain to get through them. But they still weren't close enough to go to the hospital. I was unbelievably frustrated at this point. I never imagined labor being that painful because I had fully planned on getting an epidural before I was in that much pain. I couldn't take the pain anymore and I felt like there was no way I could stay at home. We debated about calling for a little while because I knew she was going to say that I should wait until the contractions were closer together. Around 9:30 or so, I asked Kurt to call the doctor. I wanted to know if she could call in a pain medicine to CVS if they wouldn't let me come into the hospital. Of course, she said she couldn't do this but said that I could take more Tylenol PM. So I did. And I tried to sleep. 100% impossible. 


After trying to sleep/get comfortable for an hour or so, I had had it. I told Kurt we were leaving. I didn't care that my contractions weren't 5 minutes apart. I know my body and knew that the pain meant I was in full on labor. We didn't call, we just stormed out of the house and were on our way. I was pissed. This was not going how I wanted it to and I was so mad that I wasn't already at the hospital! It hurt so much to walk and sit so I knew the car ride was going to be terrible. And it was. This trip up north was very different than the morning trip. 

As we were leaving the house, the garage door clicker in Kurt's car broke. We were both in complete shock that this was actually happening! Kurt had to get out of the car and try to figure out a way to get the door shut so that all the stuff in our garage didn't get stolen!!! He was able to get it fixed pretty quickly and we got on our way. Of course there was a ton of traffic at 11:00 on a Saturday night. What was going on, who knows, but why wouldn't there be traffic at this point?!? Oh, and we got stopped at almost every red light. ha


Thirty minutes later, we were finally at the hospital. Because it was so late, we had to go in through the ER. Kurt dropped me off at the door and this time I couldn't stand while I waited for him. I had to sit in a wheelchair close to the door. An ER nurse came in and asked if I wanted to wait inside for him, but I was so hot, being close to the door felt good. The nurse took us upstairs to a room next to the one we were in that morning. She took my information while another nurse came in to take my vitals, get the monitors hooked up, and check me. I'm pretty sure there was no question about them admitting me. They weren't taking their time like they were that morning. At this point, I was shaking because I was in so much pain and my blood pressure had spiked. The nurse quickly checked me and I was 6 cm. All that I could think was, "ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME! 6 CM! I should have been at the hospital hours ago!!!!" The nurse called Dr. Moon to let her know that I was in fact in active labor and they were in the process of admitting me. The nurse asked if/when I wanted an epidural and my answer was, "Yes, hours ago." 




Kurt helped me into a wheelchair and grabbed all of our things. The nurse showed us to our labor and delivery room. She let me know that before I could get an epidural, she needed to give me a whole bag of fluid. She put my IV in and pumped a bag of fluid into me as quickly as she could. About 11:45, the nurse was able to call the anesthesiologist to come in for my epidural. Thank the Lord! The doctor was extremely nice and told me everything that she was doing while she worked. The first part hurt a little bit but the rest was just a little uncomfortable. I ended up having a couple contractions while she was working. Once she was finished, I was able to feel two or three contractions and then the medicine set in. It was unbelievable. Why anyone would not want an epidural is a mystery to me! Within minutes I was able to relax and my mood drastically changed. I was able to get comfortable and knew I was ready to get some sleep. We called/texted a few people to update them and then turned out the lights to get some rest. 




Kurt and I slept so much that night! We got a good 7-8 hours of awesome rest. After about 4 hours, I could tell my epidural was wearing off. I ended up getting some more medicine about every 4 hours or so to make sure I stayed comfortable. At 7am I could hear the nurses switching. I could hear my nurse updating the new nurse, Amy, with what was going on with me. Then I heard Amy call Dr. Moon to let her know that she was going to start me on pitocin because after 7 hours, I was still at 6 cm. Amy came in to our room to introduce herself and let me know that she had just put an order in for pitocin. She said that my contractions were still not consistent enough and that's probably why I wasn't dilating. {Side note - this was over 24 hours after my labor started and my contractions still weren't consistently 5 minutes apart. Thank God I didn't wait any longer for them to get closer together at home because they never did on their own!!!}

Because epidurals are so awesome, I didn't feel the pitocin kick in at all. A couple hours after she started the drip, Amy came in to tell me that my contractions were now consistently coming every two to three minutes. Thankfully, I didn't feel a thing! She continued to check me and while the contractions were getting closer together, I was stuck at 6cm. She told us she was going to give my body a little more time to dilate and if it didn't, they would insert an internal fetal monitor to check the strength of my contractions. 

My parents called us after they went to mass and wondered if they could come up for a visit. This was around 9am and we had pretty much just woken up. They brought Kurt some breakfast and hung out for a bit. It was nice to have visitors since we had been there for so long. Once they left, we decided to put a movie on to try and pass some time. Shortly after, Dr. Moon came in for the first time. They went ahead and checked me again and I was still at 6cm. They decided to put in the fetal monitor to check things out. They had to leave that in for an hour or so before they could tell if my contractions were strong enough or not. 

We decided to rest a little more once they left the room. About an hour or so later, Amy came in to report that my contractions were as strong as they were ever going to get and that the strength of them should be causing my body to dilate to 10cm. She did not need to increase the pitocin. I went ahead and asked her at what point we'd do a c-section. I had been in labor for so long that I wanted to have a vaginal delivery but we were so ready to have the baby. I was definitely not opposed to having a c-section if I needed one. Amy said they were going to give my body 2 hours {this was right before 1pm -- the start of the IU game} to get from 6 to 10cm. If I didn't fully dilate by 3pm, they were going to do a c-section. She asked us if that was ok and if that would give us enough time to watch the game. We assured her that the plan was perfect. :) 

Kurt and I contacted both of our parents to let them know of the plan. We told them that we'd let them know at 3 what was going to happen. Around 2:30, my epidural started to wear off a little bit so I asked Amy to call the anesthesiologist for me. She wondered if I wanted to wait until 3 to get checked or if I wanted her to just see what was going on at that point. I told her to just check me because if my body wasn't doing anything they might as well start prepping the OR for the surgery. As she checked me she got this look of disbelief on her face...I was 10cm and ready to start pushing when I felt ready! We couldn't believe it! We were pretty much ready for a c-section. 

As she started prepping the room and getting all the supplies together, we finished watching IU beat Michigan St. I was getting more uncomfortable as the game was finishing up, so I wasn't totally paying attention. I was hoping that the anesthesiologist would hurry up and give me some more meds! He came in but only gave me a little bit of medicine. They didn't want me to have too much so that I could push. When the game was over, we turned off the TV, Dr. Moon came in, and I got started pushing! {Kurt quickly texted our parents to let them know I was ready to push...they were shocked! They all came to the hospital at this point and waited for the big news in the waiting room!} This was shortly after 3pm. The next two hours went pretty quickly for me because I was pushing every 2 to 3 minutes when I had a contraction. Midway through, the pain was starting to come back. They went ahead and decided it was best for me to get more epidural medicine because I wasn't able to push very well with the pain I was feeling. Thank goodness I got more medicine! It helped me relax and push much better. 

At 5:12 pm, our little girl was born. Within seconds, everything changed. I felt a ton of pressure once she was born and could tell that she was out. I heard, "It's a girl!" and the next thing I knew she was being whisked away to the warming station and 5 or 6 NICU nurses and doctors were rushing in the room. Norah was not crying. I know enough about babies to know that something was really wrong at this point and I completely lost it. Not only was I emotional from just having a baby {A GIRL!} and being in labor for 39 hours, but now my little baby wasn't breathing for all I could tell! The worst part...there was not a single thing I could do. I laid in the bed helpless crying out, "She's not crying! She's not crying!" as the doctors and nurses tried to update me on her status and reassure me that in fact she was breathing. At this point, I had absolutely no idea what in the world happened. Amy and Dr. Moon commented the whole pushing process at how well the baby was tolerating labor/my contractions so I didn't know where everything went downhill. We later found out that Norah scored a 1 on her one minute APGAR test. The scores go from 0 (being the worst) to 10. Pretty scary. 

The doctors/nurses worked on Norah for a few minutes {what felt like hours to me} in our room before swaddling her up and taking her to the NICU. They did bring her over to me for a quick peek before leaving the room. I was so confused and worried at this point. I had no idea what all just happened and pretty much thought that my baby was going to die. So many bad thoughts kept circling my head and I didn't know what to do. Once Dr. Moon had me cleaned up and Kurt and I had calmed down a bit, we started talking about what in the world just happened. 

Norah's umbilical cord was around her neck but it was never tight. On the very last push the cord tugged and tightened around her neck. As this happened, she became shocked and took a big gasp. When babies are born, they are supposed to cry because there is so much fluid that needs to come out of their mouths/lungs. When Norah gasped, she inhaled the fluid that she had been living in for the past 9 months. Her lungs became full of fluid, making it difficult for her to breath. She wasn't crying, she was gasping for air. I'm so glad I wasn't able to see any of this going on. Kurt watched the whole thing unfold before him...how scary! Dr. Moon tested the oxygen levels in the cord blood. Thankfully, the oxygen levels in the cord blood was not low because Dr. Moon was able to cut it from being around her neck so quickly. 

Once all the doctors and nurses left the room, Kurt and I just sat there in disbelief. We couldn't believe that we had a girl. We absolutely couldn't believe we had such a small baby! And we were shocked at the events that unfolded in the last hour or so. I was in no mood to see anyone because I knew I'd totally loose it. However, I knew we couldn't keep our families waiting any longer. They had been there for a long time and it was now well after 6:00. I told Kurt that he should probably go to the waiting room and let our families know the news but that I absolutely didn't want anyone to come back to see me. 

So there I was, all alone in this huge hospital room. I had no idea what was going on with my new baby. I lost it. 

Kurt came back to the room and wanted to know if I wanted to eat. You would think I would have been starving, but I couldn't even think about food. I was really thirsty though and he was able to go across the hall to get me a sprite. Amy came in and asked if she could take our camera to the NICU to take some pictures of Norah and check in on her. This helped calm me a little. She was able to give us a little update on her. She also reminded me that I really needed to eat. She went and grabbed a ton of snacks for us. We got news from the nurses that we would get to go see Norah in a little while before I moved to my post-partum room. Kurt went to the waiting room to let our parents know that they probably weren't going to get to see Norah anytime soon and they should probably go grab dinner while waiting. He asked if they could bring us back some food too. 

Amy came back with some snacks for us and to say goodbye because her shift was over. Thank God we had her the whole day. What an amazing nurse she is! I am so thankful for everything she did for us. As she was walking out of the room, she said, "See you in about two years!" We all started laughing and I was thinking, "No way in hell I'll be back in two years after what just happened!" Whenever baby #2 comes around, I will be praying for a nurse half as good as Amy is. Maybe we'll even be lucky enough to have her again! 

Around 7:30ish, a nurse came in and told us she was going to take us to see Norah. She prepped us for what she'd look like, but also told us that we weren't allowed to touch her or arouse her in any way because of some test she was having done at 9pm. Over two hours after delivering Norah, we were finally able to see her and talk to her. It was the worst feeling in the world to see her hooked up to all the machines. I would have done anything in that moment to take all the pain away from her. It was even worse when she started to cry and we couldn't do a thing for her. I'll never forget that. 

We stayed in her NICU room for a little while. I remember feeling a little disconnected from her, like she wasn't really mine. The whole experience felt so surreal. 

We left her room so that she could have her test done and we could get all of our things moved into our new room. As Kurt was wheeling me down to our new room, our families returned from dinner with a HUGE pizza for us! But, the nurse was also waiting for me to do my first check up. We asked our families to leave the room so the nurse could check me and I could get situated in bed. Once she was finished, our families came back in our room and we were finally able to eat. I don't think we've ever eaten so quickly in our lives! Our families visited for a little while and then decided to head home. By the time they left, it was time for the nurse to do another check up on me. 

We ended up needing to stay in our room for a little while longer because the nurse didn't want me to leave before I needed to get my next check up. Once she checked me for the third time, she was able to help me into a wheel chair and we headed back to Norah's room. Around midnight, we were finally able to hold our little girl for the first time. 

{Hooked up to so many things...}

The next morning while I showered, Kurt went down to check on Norah. He came back with good news. She was doing so well they were able to take her off the oxygen. Norah didn't start eating until almost 24 hours after she was born. It was a bit stressful trying to get her interested in eating. Once they confirmed that she did not in fact have pneumonia, the doctors wanted to make sure that she was eating enough before they would allow us to take her home. Once she was finally able to get latched on and interested, she was quite the eating champ...and still is now! 

{Finally getting to spend time together.}

Within the first 48 hours of her life, Norah proved to all of us how strong she is and that she'll never give up. It was amazing to see how calm she was when the nurses and doctors picked and prodded at her. Kurt and I will never forget the neonatal doctor coming in to tell us that we were going to get to take her home just 48 hours after her delivery. Even she was shocked that she was able to give us that news. As she left the room, I broke down into tears. Those 48 hours were the most scary and tiring of my life, and we were SO happy to be able to see Norah all wire free and ready to go home. 

{I hated seeing her with all these cords. It was so nice when they all came off!}

We thank God every day for our precious, healthy little girl. We are so thankful for everything that the nurses and doctors did during our short stay at the hospital. They did an amazing job. Thankfully the complications that occurred during birth have no lingering effects. She is completely healthy and doing really well. Although that whole experience was painful, stressful, and unimaginable, this is Norah's story and we wouldn't change it a bit.